About Showing Up 

The scene for this week's blog was taken at a wellness center/ emergency care facility near me. The campus is designed with native prairie plants and water features which are distributed along various walking paths crisscrossing the facility.  For a place whose mission is health and wellness, their design for the exterior aligns well with their work occuring inside the walls.  Just walking from the parking lot to the front doors begins a subtle process of refocusing the mind.

I am starting to write down a set of concepts that I believe are marker buoys for my life. I chose to do this because a guy at my age should be able to articulate their learnings from the good and bad within a lifetime. One of the concepts on my list has to do with showing up. Life is more satisfying and meaningful as I learned to show up and be a particpant.  This means actively showing up to support family and friends as a means of supporting their choices in life.  This can take the form of cheering for the grandkids and other little ones as they run the bases at a baseball game, saying a word encouragement to a teenager experiencing the dumps, or offering congratulations to say "atta boy" when a promotion or milestone is achieved. It can meaning actually showing up to meet with a someone during a time of need not necessarily to commiserate or grieve but just to simply be with them. The point is to be there physically as much as possible.

This week I learned that showing up can also be applied to yourself.  I'm not sure that I understand the trendy terms of mindfulness or meditatation.  I like to think of this experience as finding quiet moments when they occur.  During these moments, I don't think about anything, but I am just there to be still, listen and see.  I just show up.  

This photo was taken at the scene where my quiet moment occurred this week.  At the time, I didn't even consider photographing it.  It was after those quiet moments had passed, I thought about taking the photograph as a way to help me remember this simple part of my very ordinary day. 

Taken with:

13 year old Olympus OMD EM5 and Sigma mft 60mm f2.8.   

Carry Flowers ; Wear a Smile 

Saturday morning I took my Olympus 4/3 camera to the local farmer's market to test my newest lens on it.  While new to me, the camera and lens are used equipment I bought separately on the cheap to use for dabbling in street photography and to tag along with me when I don't want to be loaded down with larger gear.  The little OMD me5 will fit into the pouch of a sweatshirt with the small kit zoom attached.

This is one of my first shots with the Sigma Art 60mm f2.8.  My reason for buying this lens was to supplement the kit zoom lens in taking  portraits and some event photography.  Mounted on the Oly me5,  it has an effective focal reach of 120mm.  Today, it feels a bit long for street photography but it has the ability to capture some scenes discreetly from a modest distance.  Since this was my first outing with it, I need more time to learn whether it is just for portraits or if has a place in the streets as well.

I am a people watcher so I enjoy watching the activities people participate in all around me.  After watching people carrying their various farm market purchases, I came to the conclusion that people who carry flowers also carry a smile on their faces.  The photo chosen this week was a candid taken as she was approaching me.  Her smile as 

fresh and vibrant as the flowers she carried.

 Swimming in the Wake

This week my wife and I celebrated or 50th wedding anniversary with family and friends.  We rented a venue and invited about 55-60 people who share a family history with us.   Although we invited our children to help us plan the celebration, they stealthfully took over all aspects from designing and sending invitations to the final clean up after the event ended.  In short, they largely intended to keep us somewhat removed until the day of the event.  We loved and will forever cherish their efforts!

The day before our party,  I grew anxious as a kid does when anticipating Christmas Day.  To help settle myself, I grabbed my camera and headed to nearby Nygren Wetlands for an hour.  Being alone in nature has a way of emotionally centering me and mentally reorganizing my thoughts into a new perspective.  While at the wetlands, I watched and photographed a momma Mallard and her brood of six ducklings.

When I first spotted them, they were well out of range for a photo so I patiently waited for them as they slowly came nearer.  I'm not a patient person, but I'm learning to be one and I mentally chuckled at the irony of a guy waiting for over one half hour while holding a camera designed to shoot thirty frames per second and to instantaneously focus and track any variety of speedy subjects.  While designed for speed, my gear is a slave to nature's timing.  This is why my spouse and family continue to educate me in the value of waiting patiently for things to come to me.  Photography has helped me put this truth into practice.

As momma Mallard and her crew meandered nearer, her ducklings squirted in and out of the grasses exploring and splashing each other as if playing some variety of duck tag.  Momma casually paddled up the rear some distance behind her ducklings as if this was her time to enjoy some peace.  She seemed to enjoy leisurely eating snacks, but would occasionally abruptly stop and scan her surroundings and check for her rambunctious little quackers.  When they were directly in front of me,  momma gave some sort of secret signal that immediately gathered her little brood about her.  At that point, momma made an about turn and began swimming resolutely in the opposite direction with all her little fuzz balls falling into line as if they were a polished drill team.   

Still thinking about our celebration just hours away,  I thought about those 50 years of marriage and how we traveled together over those many years. I noticed the wake flowing in evering widening ripples behind this little duck family, and I thought about how our marriage was similar to what was unfolding before my eyes.  

How fortunate I have been to love and share a life with a woman who intuitively knows when it is her turn to swim at the point. There have been many times during our 50 years where one or the other of us found comfort swimming behind the other within their wake where life's waters were smoother and the path was clearly marked by the other.  

I am pleased when I see our adult married children also taking turns swimming at the point with their spouses.  It is comforting to know that we are welcome to join within their wake when we experience choppy waters.   

It is exciting to celebrate personal achievements like a 50th wedding anniversary because they mark important milestones in our lives.  These celebrations highlight the good choices made and the commitments made to one another for better or for worse over time.  They are made sweeter by reminding us of the love and graciousness offered by the many others who have permitted us to swim in their wakes when we needed support and direction along life's journey.

 

Now You See It, and Now You Don't!

Photographs help us time travel.  Most of that travel is into the past, but occasionally photos help us travel to the future by helping us see the present moment clearly.  This singular moment acts as a portal to the future by instantaneous-ly uniting the past and present giving entry to the future. 

This week, while having coffee with a friend, I took this week's blog photo with my cell phone.  (Yea the image quality is not great, but I am a guy who buys a phone to use as a phone. If my phone can take an adequate photo that's good, however if it could make morning coffee, mark it sold.)   The gray haired guy sat alone at his table drinking his coffee and reading a print newspaper --- a genuine comic book smelling, smudgy, inky newspaper complete with rustling sounds when the pages are turned!  This scene brought back fond memories while presenting me with a revelation --- how quickly we can unknowingly lose sight of seeing something that was once a common occurrence.

Printed newspapers have silently vanished from our public landscape, and I didn't even notice it.  When was the last time you saw a person in a coffee shop, bus, park bench, or doctor's office reading a newspaper?  I get my news online today --- no more delivery problems, smudged fingers, or guilt about killing trees.  In truth, I miss the smell of a newspaper and I am an advocate of the free press which among our country's population I fear is shrinking.  

If it is printed on paper, there is a implied legitimacy about its content that is lacking online where the content can be removed at the push of a button like it never existed.  Printed news seems to hold potential for public shame for its inaccuracies --- think the headline "Dewey Defeats Truman"!   Today, there seems to be more veiled commentary online posing as the news.  This goes across all media today.  I fear that the abundant commentary is consumed as the news and that we are inclined to let others think about the news for us as opposed to doing it ourself.

Well, it's time to chase some neighborhood kids off my lawn.  Every once in a while the Grumpy Old Photographer in me surfaces and stubbles on to center stage.  Apologies to the audience!

I Wish I Were an Oscar Mayer ...

This past Monday, I attended the Memorial Day Parade in a neighboring community.  The drive to the parade was almost an hour away from my home, but I was not deterred since this parade would display the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile.  When I last saw the Weinermobile, I was ten years old so therefore this day trip was more of a reunion with a pleasant childhood memory.  During my first encounter with the Weinermobile,  I was gifted with the treasured "weinerwhistle" which remains to this day, one my favorite musical instruments second only to the kazoo.   Unfortunately, my parents didn't share my zest for the "weinerwhistle" since it mysteriously disappeared about one week later.  

All I wanted for this Memorial Day was to take a photo of the beloved Weinermobile.  My hope was to relive and reconfirm this happy childhood moment to see if it had any life other than within my memory.  Should the "hotdoggers",  the official title of those who travel in the Weinermobile, toss weinerwhistles or eight packs of hot dogs into the crowd that would be considered a bonus.  

With this in mind, I selected a strategic position behind two old gray haired ladies seated on lawn chairs in the very first row.  Later, this strategic choice would be revealed to be a failed assumption on my part.  Little did I know that their retirement home had substituted speed for their Lipitor on this holiday.  As soon as the parade began, they were up out of their chairs clapping, waving, and pointing out the choicest parade candies to the "youngins" all around them. To my suprise, they were the only folks who remained standing in the front row well after everyone else had returned to their seats.  Nearly forty minutes elapsed before their legs or perhaps the drugs gave way to sitting.  Just about that time, the Weinermobile entered the parade on the next block.  My wish for the day was about to be realized.

I am grateful that I could experience my reunion with the Weinermobile at a parade in rural Illinois in the presence of waving and shouting kids.   My first memory of the Weinermobile lies within the small secure neighborhood of a ten year old who lived during simpler times.  Would the presence of this brightly colored entree on wheels, still excite kids and adults alike who find entertainment only on digital screens?  For me, this photo confirmed that answer.

One of the reasons people love photography is its ability to preserve a memory.  This week's photo wasn't as much about preserving a memory as it was about reconnecting with my childhood once again to confirm that there are still kid like tendencies alive within me --- just like those gray haired ladies who thankfully are seated in front of me.  By taking the photo, I confirmed that I am not as grown up and packaged as I and others may perceive me to be.  

Today, I rediscovered that same feeling of overwhelming delight which I once experienced as a ten year old kid who pedaled his Ranger bike to a nearby supermarket only to encounter the Weinermobile for the first time.  Once again, I discovered that a brightly colored giant 27 foot long hot dog on wheels can still flood my soul with simple joy.  In a world with so many doubts and changes confronting us daily, this enduring connection brings great satisfaction.

What Pushes Your Photographic Buttons?

My blog subject for this week has less to do with the photo I posted and more to do with the person pushing the buttons.  In my last blog I stated that I when I reviewed photos from the past two years, I discovered that I have framed and posted fewer people photos. This caused me to wonder why this is true because I enjoy watching and working with people.  I enjoy meeting new people and hearing their ideas and life stories so I do not believe that I have many hermit tendencies.  

This week I watched a video on the website fstoppers.com. 

Your Personality Might Be Shaping Your Photography,          Here's How 

This article motivated me to further explore why I photograph and share certain subjects more than others,  and how my choice of photographic subjects may be related to my personality.  Fstoppers features video produced by Ben Harvey, where he references a website that contains a free online version of the Meyers/Briggs personality assessment.  He shared how he used his results to better understand how his photography is influenced by his personality traits.   Many years ago I had taken this assessment as part of a training session at work and here again, in retirement,  I took it once again looking for insights into my photography.  My results showed some nuances that have emerged as one proceeds from career to retirement years but basically my personality has remained unchanged --- something that I cannot claim for the size of my jeans during that period.

What this article prompted me to do was take a second look at my people photos, but not limit that look to only those photos which I have framed or posted.  I discovered that I appear to take take a fair amount of people photos, mostly family and friends who are participating in various events and casual settings.  What I discovered through this second review, by use of the results of my personality assessment, is that I do take people pictures but tend not to make many of them public.  Because I tend to be a private person I likely shield my family photos as a reaction to my impulse to protect them (yea, another older generation hang up as opposed to society's frequency in sharing of such on social media).  A second reason for not sharing family/friends photos is that doing so seems a bit boastful.  I'm proud of my family and regard them along with my friends as the greatest treasures in my life.  Many other people's life experiences have not led them to similar feelings.  Consequently, my photos may appear as jaded or even boastful like some Facebook posts and Christmas letters.

When I view photos created by others, I will frequently ask them about their motivation to capture that moment in a certain manner.  How does their photo speak to them?  I never have asked another photographer why they posted or shared a framed photograph.  If I did so, maybe I would discover a bit more about their personality just as I have discovered from my own reflections this past week.

And It's Yesterday Once More

One photography goal I set for this year is to take more photos of people whether they are candids or portraits.  I came to settle on this goal after looking at the photos I have taken over the last two years.  I enjoy being around people and people watching, but I take very few people photos.  Maybe, I have been reluctant to take photos of others because I do not like having my photo taken for unknown reasons.  However, I got a good start on my goal this past weekend when we were invited to our daughter's home prior to attending a theater performance later that evening. 

Several weeks ago, my granddaughter called me after picking out her prom dress telling me about how excited she was about this beautiful dress which she ended up buying even though it was not at all like the dress she was intending to purchase.  She went on to tell me how she was looking forward to celebrating at prom with her friends and a young man who had recently entered her life. As we concluded our conversation, she reminded me to be sure to bring my camera when I came to her house that evening telling me she wanted me to take some photos of her and her date. What she left out of that conversation was the fact that she had invited eight of her friends and their dates to her house before going to the prom.  

As the kids continued to arrive, more requests for photos came from my granddaughter and her friends and also from the parents of her friends. Each of her friends had a phone as did their parents and before we knew it, we were immersed in a full blown photo frenzy.

The photo featured this week offered me a glimpse of what it was like to be sixteen after all these years.  Before any of her friends arrived, I watched her take a short video of herself which brought back personal memories about being sixteen back in the 60s. It's easy to recall the events, the people, and the music, but it is difficult to rediscover how intensely you embraced life at sixteen when each moment can  leave you feeling as if you are suspended somewhere between elation and utter exclusion.   

I noticed that my granddaughter was using her phone to capture a video of a private moment.  During the sixties it was unlikely that any of us would have carried a camera at our side to capture candid moments with our friends.  In that era, the best you may get is an obligatory parent photo or a minute or two of spontaneity in a photobooth at the Walgreens.  Today all teens carry cell phones as though they were a third arm, causing me to wonder if their culture of limitless candids and videos will help them better preserve those moments of intense feelings after they become staid middle aged parents.

My photo was intended to capture my granddaughter's contemplative mood and the emergence of pre-prom "butterflies".  I chose to make the outdoor background black and white while retaining my granddaughter and her phone in color to express what it is to be sixteen when the vibrance and glow of special moments falls only on you and the rest of the world seems unfocused and unimportant.  While I was photographing her friends,  what became apparent to me was the energy and exuberance of being sixteen and facing limitless adventures.  Being with them reminded me of what most of us oldies forget about when we were teens -- those moments of living without a filtered and seasoned perspective thereby experiencing life so adventurously that each moment can potentially take your breath away.   I can't say I miss that 16 year old feeling, but it sure helps me to cherish the love, patience and understanding of my parents and other adults who stood by me during those teen years.